You say “Normal” ?

It’s now April and the weather has gone all awry. I wonder if sometimes there is ever a “normal.” Perhaps we just adjust and what is awry now will be the new “normal.”

On some days it is so hot you would think you could fry and egg on the scorching cement ground. Hot air rises from the ground and at ten at night, the walls to my house are still warm despite my having the air conditioning on.

The past two days it has been cooler after thunderstorm rain poured down last week and a summer storm is now blowing through Bangkok. It’s cloudy and windy. Leaves flutter in the hot wind and paper fly through the air. It conjures up images of mid western towns in the middle of nowhere where the wind blows through every nook and cranny. Only we aren’t in the midwest, we’re in Bangkok.

I say this weather isn’t normal for Bangkok. It started to be hot with temperatures in the mid 30’s Celsius even before March started. It rained in January and February when usually it is dry, cool and sunny.

How will it be next year? Will it go back to how it once was or shall will we all have to accustom ourselves to this crazy weather pattern? Maybe future generations will only know this weather.

So “normal” is really just a word we use to describe what we are used and accustomed to. Soon I bet this now “strange” weather will become “normal.” Normal therefore is in reality constantly changing depending upon your definition.

Same applies to everything else in life. What do you think ?

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Words & Power

This year has started out in a storm for many people I know. Even the weather gods are thinking that too with thunderstorms roaring across Bangkok when usually it is dry, sunny and cool. Nevertheless, let us not keep us from enjoying the wonderful year ahead of us. 🙂 Today I want to write about something that sometimes we forget. We use it everyday, we use it all time and yet we forget to think about them. (I do forget often times) What am I talking about? Words. Yes, words like the ones you are reading now.

Words to me are powerful and should be used with care. Words spoken or written have enormous influence and have resulted in either love or wars amongst men. It is with words, that people communicate and it is with words that others sometimes feel love, compassion, sympathy and understanding. Used otherwise, they cause others to feel anger, resentment or even sadness. Words can sometimes be therapeutic and healing, yet words of angerness, bitterness, judgement can also invoke within others pain and destruction. The words you hear, you say, you read affect and influence the person you become. Sometimes decades later, you hear people talking about words that were said. It can be that powerful.

For example think of children being bullied in school. Words from bullies can break down children’s confidence, wreak them emotionally and years after some may continue to remember those painful words. Yet at the same time, words of tenderness and love may keep many going on and on for years. (I’m thinking of those movies where the girl waits for her man at war.)

Words are powerful, so use your words with care this year. Becareful of what words you use. Remember to be aware of your words when you speak for that is when we often slip. Positive words generate positive energy whilst negative words generate negative energy. The world is stressful enough. Why not make it a little more pleasant by watching what we say for words form who we are and form those around us. 🙂 If you want it to be positive, use postive words! Kill those negatives!

“I am” or is it “I intend?”

If you missed me the past few days, I have to admit I’ve been feeling a bit “under the weather.”   I suppose it’s a good phrase to use at this time of year  when the weather in Bangkok is just plain bothersome.   It’s extremely hot in the mornings and then in the afternoons, it’ll rain cats and dogs out of
nowhere.   Anyways, still a bit “under the weather” but determined not to let it stop me from doing what I love today (blogging of course!)  I thought I’d write a bit about “intention versus actions.”

This is something that took me awhile to understand and now that I do, I think it makes great sense. Thank you Alex.  Here’s an example I think many of you can relate to.  It’s something that’s happened to me year in, year out. (Thank goodness I’ve gotten it over with..)   Every year I’d make the same resolution and somehow as the year passed it’d fade away quietly.   It goes like this.

I want to lose weight.

I want to lose 10kgs in six months.   After six months, however, I weigh myself and realize that I had lost only 5 kgs.  That’s only half of what I aimed for.  Some years I don’t lose any.  My weigh scale is broken.

Upon looking back, during those six months it turns out I’ve been eating out with friends, I’ve been going to parties, having ice cream and cake or just enjoying my dinners out.  My “action” was not that of one who was on a diet to lose weight.     Interestingly though, during the entire six months since I made my resolution I say that I am on a “diet.”  I’m dieting.   I’d tell people I’m on a diet.  I’m going to lose that weight I gained earlier.

If you really think about it, during the six months when you say that you are on a “diet”, you are really saying that you are “intending” to be on a diet.  Your actions show that you are not really on a diet.  You still eat cheese (yes I love cheese especially the creamy kind), have ice cream and fried foods.  All the foods you shouldn’t be eating if you were really on a diet.  You “intend” to be on a diet, but your “action” is of one who is not on a diet.

What does this tell us?  That sometimes you have to read between the lines.  A person may be saying that they are “doing” something when in reality it means that they “intend” to do something.   Their actions might not follow through.  Upon understanding this, you’d be able to control your expectations regarding a person’s “intention” versus a person’s “action.”

To the person saying it, if you say ” I ‘intend’  to lose weight” versus “I am taking ‘action’ to lose weight,”  this is also a clear way of communicating to yourself.  You know that although you “intend” to be on a diet, you realize that you aren’t yet taking the actions.  This will hopefully provoke you into taking action.

Using language precisely is important.  It allows us to communicate clearly to ourselves and to the person around us.  What do you think?  Have you noticed how sometimes we mumble jumble the two?

The Power of Words

Words can have powerful meaning and effect on people.   Of course we all know that its the “actions” that count and not the “words”, but don’t underestimate the power of choosing and saying the right “words.”  Words are a form of communication that is irreplaceable.  Afterall, it is how we humans communicate to one another.

There are those who speak without thinking and just say whatever comes to mind.  There are those who speak from their emotions and those who choosing their words wisely before speaking.   There are those who speak a certain way and use words to try and gauge your reaction to a certain topic and those who twist your words around.

Words in effect are a reflection of the person we are.

If we always use negative words which emphasize how horribly tragic our life is and miserable it is, it can have an adverse effect on our brain.  Everyday, we’ll be infused with words describing the sorry state of our lives.  Everyday we tell ourselves how horrible and sad our life is.  Then of course, our life will be just that. Tragic, sad, and horrible.

However, if we use positive words daily and say words that are “positive” and see things from a positive point of view, you’ll realize that life isn’t all that bad.  What you previously complained about could be much better than the alternative.  There is always a good and bad side to every thing.  Just find the good side and talk about it.  You’ll feel much more positive and happy.

Now, its not only choosing negative and positive words that matter. What also matters is how the words come across to the person listening to you.  Some people are a lot more sensitive than others.  Some grab onto that “word” that was said and brood about it for days on end.  Some just brush it aside and forget about it.

Some phrases or comments stick to you no matter how long ago it was said.  You feel like the words were thrown on your face.  Some people spend a lifetime with a “word” or phrase stuck at the back of their mind.  Words that were said to them decades ago out of anger or fury.  It’s unhealthy and definitely not good for the soul.  Words shouldn’t be stuck inside like a growing cancer.

And its these little things called “words” that can cause wars and disagreements.  They are all so important.  So just becareful before you say anything.   Although not sharp like a sword, words can pierce through your heart and forever leave a mark.

Be positive, use positve words and don’t leave a scar 🙂