Self-compassion

The other day I read a very interesting article in the New York Times entitled “Go Easy on Yourself, a New Wave of Research Urges.”  It talks about how those who have more self-compassion are often happier, more optimistic and have less anxiety.  I think so too.

People are often hard on themselves, wanting to be perfect and wanting to do everything the way it should be.  Even Benjamin Franklin had his thirteen virtues which he worked on his entire life.  Even then, it was hard to accomplish.  As humans we are not perfect and no one can always be so disciplined.  If we were perfect, I suppose we would all be elsewhere. 

What is important though is that we must realize that we are not perfect, accept our imperfections and accept our failures.  We must accept that there are certain parts of us which are undesirable, work on it and don’t forget about it.

The article cites research that show that those who were taught self-compassion did less emotional eating.  “Going easy” on yourself during that diet, may be the more sustainable solution rather than strictly following strict rules.

I have to admit I agree with it.  I’m not a very disciplined person and I do often give myself a bite of that dark cake or fatty sausage.  If I were too strict with myself and never allow myself any treats, I know I’d stop exercising and end up giving in to emotional overeating. I’ll overeat when I can, just because I’ve been deprived of my treats previously.  As the article says, allow your room some slack, but it doesn’t mean you are stopping that exercise or being lazy, realize you are imperfect, accept your imperfections, and work on it. 🙂

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3 thoughts on “Self-compassion

  1. Cutting oneself some slack is clearly the number one key to happiness. Most of us beat ourselves up over every little thing, most of which are entirely pointless.

    This little step is one I haven’t mastered. If you do, write a book and make a few million. 😀

    Do the best you can today and don’t worry about tomorrow or yesterday’s mistakes. We can only do something about the present not the past or future.

    The Grumpy Man

    1. Yes, definitely do agree. A lot of times the pressure comes from ourselves and it ends up being self destructive for our health. Hahaha…I think its very hard to accomplish, so the million might be a bit far off!! Congrats on having lost 100 lbs though, now that is real accomplishment!! 33 pounds was a lot for me and that has been a life changing experience 🙂 I’m glad did it and I am sure you are too!! Keep up the good work!

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